YTAH's Weblog

A CALL TO ARMS: Welcome to Racism Week.

Posted in rants,satire by YTAH on October 21, 2008
Tags: , , ,


Love, Peace, and … Death Threats? Bring it on!

Ooooo, they’ve found us. Yep, some “white supremacy” bullshit artists stumbled across Pinvictor’s satire on racism and then made vague threats of physical violence. Ooooo, scary.

Our detractors in their natural habitat.

Our detractors in their natural habitat.

Or not. Apparently, the best way to intimidate somebody is to post anonymous comments on internet chatrooms. Which kind of pisses us off, since they didn’t even threaten the right person or post a current address. (Full disclosure: it’s about half a decade out of date.) Come on, guys, give the devil his due; if you can’t bother reading the by-line, maybe you should quit while you’re ahead. What, you’re still not over the fact that your mommies didn’t love you, you dickless fucks? You still think intimidation will compensate for your lamentable lack of a brain? But thanks – thanks for taking the time to share your stupidity with the rest of us. I’m sure it was a real effort to interrupt your oh-so-strenuous daily routine of pretending to be a ninth-level elf mage while ignoring the black cleaning-woman vacuuming chips out of the carpet. I suppose we ought to be grateful you didn’t drag your sickly white purulent flesh out of the house, otherwise we all might have had the image of your sweaty, steroid-swollen body seared onto our retinas. Now that you’ve gotten some attention, you can do the world a favour and shut the fuck up about how pathetic you are, you miserable turd.

So after finding the aforementioned post, we did a bit of scouting around, and discovered that the ire had spread through the White Poes Network (WPN), where, as you may expect, stupidity was compounded by inbreeding. By far the most absurd threat was that they’d report us to the Human Rights Commission. Gee, somehow I’m not too worried by accusations of hate speech from a site that happily posts comments about “K4s” and “shitskins.” You can imagine what it’s like when they try to put together an argument (at least, what they think of as “an argument”): “These K4s are always complaining about racism and hate speach, but look what they’re saying now!!!” Jesus. These people wouldn’t recognize irony if it ripped out their eyes and pissed in the sockets.

But then these people aren’t exactly big on the whole “logic” thing – or the context thing, for that matter. Or a sense of humour, or a sense of perspective, or common sense, or self-awareness, or context, or an understanding of history, economics, statistics, or ethics – basically the whole “having a brain and using it” thing. They’re the type of cunts who share half a brain cell between a family of twelve without ever using it enough to need recharging. It’s entirely appropriate that these spazzwanks got their titties in a twist because of a column that satirizes black supremacists and their ill-advised willingness to kill for fucking politicians. (And if you need a reminder of what “satire” means, bitches, I suggest you read the manifesto I wrote a while back. You can tell me yourself whether or not you think I keep my promises.)

“Ah can laiks to be white supremacyst.”

I’m sure there are lots of valid points to be made about the crime in our country, or the farm murders, or the declining whatever. Unfortunately the people making these points most vociferously are all reactionary, prejudiced jerkwads, whose every statement automatically turns into The Dumbest Fucking Opinion Actually Held By Living People, Anywhere, Ever. You know, the kind of mentally-stunted assholes who could only be the product of incestuous relations between a wankstain and a clitwort. As a result, the ridiculous inanity of their prejudices and paranoia drowns out the more reasonable voices, thereby exacerbating and prolonging the agony.

Spot the Difference, Part II.

Spot the Difference, Part II.

Their forums and their comment boards are full of the most imbecilic statements, which combine the ferociously stupid brain-farts they call “opinions” with the wildly inaccurate speculations they call ”facts”, plus an assortment of made-up statistics, paranoid delusions, and facile generalizations, strung together by the most convoluted and tangled line of “reasoning” you’ve ever seen. So it’s hardly surprising that they’d take Pinvictor’s posts at face value. No matter how overwrought or ludicrous we make each scenario, they read the articles and interpret everything … absolutely literally. After all, everything they believe is so ridiculously stupid, so how can they tell if someone’s using exaggeration for satirical effect? To them, metaphors are like the bible: intended to be taken completely at face value.

Of course the reason these racist forums exist, and why they’re so popular, is because they’re the only place these people can express their honest opinion of the world without getting arrested, or being told “You’re a fucking moron; shut up, you’re making us look bad.” It’s not that they want to have any kind of discussion – they simply want a place where they can make their racist claims with impunity, without having to explain or justify them while looking into someone’s face.

Which is why I haven’t bothered visiting their forums to explain my position. What’s the use? If I try to explain to them that I happen to think all racial separatists – black and white – can go fuck themselves with the same double-headed dildo, they wouldn’t understand why I tarred them with the same brush. And if I mentioned that I come from a nice, white, Afrikaans family, they’d probably call me a volksverraaier. (Then again, I’m a practicing homosexual, so I’ve already “betrayed my race”, what with my volksvreemde sexual habits.) But fuck ’em: if disagreeing with the dumbest cunts on earth means I have to relinquish my membership of the brain trust that is Afrikaner Nationalism, so be it. Not that I ever felt part of that particular movement, possibly because growing up, some Afrikaans twat once called me a “rooinek” and shouted at me as if I was a British soldier bayoneting his mother. Being Afrikaans myself, this struck me as a particularly daft way to live. So let me repeat to all you so-called “Nationalists” what I told myself back then: “I am not one of you. I don’t like you. We have nothing in common. And I never want to be anything like you.”

The challenge

Kiss our collective ass.

Kiss our collective ass.

Any argument that claims that South Africa’s problems could be solved by “absolute segregation of the races” is fucking stupid. And let’s face it: all those racist cunts who think a “White State” will solve anything don’t remember the Old South Africa too well. For one thing, they don’t seem to recall how all the actual work was done by black people who weren’t given access to better opportunities and had to continually be oppressed.

White pride? White whiners, more likely. Whine, whine, whine; it’s fucking pathetic. The only way you’d be more emo is if you wore black mascara. Pussies. I’m white, and proud, but my pride and my skin colour have nothing to do with each other. I don’t need some backward brainless twat telling me why I can be proud of myself. That’s because I’m not an old biddy with a wet pant, and I sure as fuck don’t need another incontinent old whore spouting racist slogans to validate my existence. I want nothing to do with your paranoia and your pathetic half-lives. Do I sound even vaguely sympathetic to you fucktards? Jesus. You haven’t even been properly oppressed, and you already whine this much? And it’s only been 14 years! How long you think Apartheid lasted?

So to all those defeatist cunts who think that the country is doomed, here’s a suggestion: why don’t you take your Afro-pessimism, your ridiculous haircuts, your repulsive families, and your Sokkie Treffers Vols. 1 – 73, and shove them up your ass? We don’t need anyone with their brains stuck in first gear and their sense of identity and culture located firmly up the ass of 1978. Or, since you’ve already decided that South Africa is hell, and couldn’t get any worse, why don’t you kill yourselves? C’mon, end your suffering – get it over with. Surely, if all right-thinking whiteys go to heaven regardless of their actions, whatever fictional being you worship will waive the “suicide” rule to allow you into that all-white heaven of your dreams?

Or better yet, show us the strength of your convictions: Share them with your boss, your neighbours, your family, or the next crowd of black people you walk past. Don’t hide the “light” of your opinions under the bushel of anonymity; shout it from the rooftops. But don’t hide behind a mask, or an alias, or a temporary e-mail address. Sign up from your work account, using your real name, and spout your racist horseshit then. I fucking dare you. Cunts.

AGAIN: THIS WAS NOT WRITTEN BY PIKES. If you insist on spewing your incoherent inanities, direct them at me. And you don’t have the balls to do it on, try doing it on one of my blogs: YTAH@24 or YTAH@WordPress.

[Originally posted on on Tuesday, October 21, 2008.]


One Response to 'A CALL TO ARMS: Welcome to Racism Week.'

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  1. The Spear said,

    Great blog, I’ll be back for sure.

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