All pics taken on a Canon 400D.

Some clouds, some houses, reeds, and lots and lots of mist. Mostly these involve buggering around with the contrast and levels.

All photos taken on a Canon 400D, 25 & 26 April.

Click each picture for a larger image and more information.

I really liked the way this one came out. Taken at approximately 7.30 in Marina da Gama, on what turned out to be a really misty morning. (It lasted until quite late.)

Hope you enjoy their blogs too.

Photos taken on a Canon EOS400D.

These photos were taken on a group expedition to Butterfly World in the Western Cape, South Africa. They were taken on a Sony CyberShot DSC-F717.

Temporary setback for gay-marriage rights in N.Y. State Senate

Thursday, December 3, 2009

NEW YORK — Anti-gay bigots prematurely celebrated a temporary success in the New York State Senate, where a proposal to legalize the perfectly sensible concept of same-sex marriage was defeated 38 to 24 on Wednesday, due solely to the power of a persistent and irrational fear of gay people.

The unexpectedly wide margin was delivered in a relatively liberal state (which TOTALLY makes New York, like, the new California). The vote prompted premature pronouncements that the momentum for gay marriage had been not only halted, but reversed. “It signals the end of the idea that you can pass humane, intelligent laws democratically, especially if it requires  people to put the needs of other people above their own prejudices,” said the leader of one such Bigot Pride organization. “I guess this proves that compassion and logic are no match for unremitting hatred and selfishness, especially when you have a bunch of demagogues and plutocrats to throw in the way of progress.”

Sensible non-bigots were taken aback by the sheer magnitude of the senate’s short-sightedness, but insisted that the results clarified the realpolitik behind the issue. In an official response, a spokesman for the Empire State Building Is A Gigantic Fucking Phallus In The Middle Of Our City, People, Srsly, How Could Have You Never Have Noticed This? said, “We have long called for a public debate on this matter so we could determine who was truly on our side, as opposed to just being full of shit like that do-nothing Obama guy.” Veering off from the prepared statement he was reading, the spokesperson – covered in glitter make-up and wearing a bouffant wig that was a life-size replica of Sarah Jessica Parker – continued, “If you cannot support us, we’ll find candidates who do. Now we know who doesn’t… and we’re coming for you, you fucking pissants.”

Anti-gay bigots said they’d spin it to the press as if New York lawmakers heeded the outcome of a similar ballot measure in Maine, but that everyone knew what really happened: a bunch of well-organized uber-bigots successfully bullied a bunch of pansy-ass Macho Men who call themselves “traditional values” politicians, thereby proving once again that femme dykes and guys who take it up the ass are way more butch than god-fearin’, gun-totin’ douchebags.

“We though they were short at least five votes, but we did not expect that there would be so many fucking cowards in that senate”, said Mary HuffnPuffnStuff, leader of How Dare Those Fags Have More Fulfilled Lives And Be Prettier Than Me, one of the more virulent hate groups. “Guess they’re not so big without their asses greased with the sauce from the Conservative Christian Values gravy train. Pussies. We totally own each of their asses.”

“I think Upstate Democrats had to be feeling the heat on this deal, too,” said Gay Son McQueer, executive director of New Yorkers for Constitutional Freedoms For Ourselves Exclusively, And Fuck Everyone Who Doesn’t Live EXACTLY The Way We Tell Them To, a lobby that represents many bigot churches. “New York 23 really showed that fucktardation is not dead on either side of the political divide.”

The National Organization for TRADITIONAL Marriage, Like God Meant It To Be, Where Closeted Guys Marry Straight Women Who Hate Sex Because They Were Always Told How Being Sexual Was Dirty And Not What Good Girls Did, was even more explicit. The organization warned ahead of the vote that it would raise at least 500K in “bigot dollars” to defeat any Republican senator who dared to think for themselves or consider how their vote would affect the lives of their constituents, as opposed to just giving in to threats from people you wouldn’t trust to wipe their asses after taking a dump for fear of brushing their hands against their “dirty place”. The heading on the group’s news release read: “Vote against Gay Marriage or We Will Fund Some Inbred, Illiterate Fuckwad Who Will Do Exactly As We Say Regardless of How Ridiculously Leotarded It Is.”

The group said they spent $600,000 opposing the effort, mostly on robo-calls in districts of senators thought to be on the fence, because really, who can tell the difference between a living human being and the unfeeling, soulless husks that make up their anti-gay bigot constituency?

HuffnPuffnStuff said, “This helps us fuck over the queers in New Hampshire, too,” where a coalition that includes Catholic bishops – who valiantly took time out from raping children and protecting pedophiles from prosecution – will attempt to penalize loving, committed couples in that state, simply because they don’t share the socio-biological accident of the bigots’ sexual orientation. “We might even ruin families in Vermont,” she added.

Fortunately, however, despite the bigots’ virulence, same-sex marriage is still legal in Iowa, Vermont, Massachusetts, and Connecticut, and becomes legal in New Hampshire on Jan. 1. Happy New Year, Fags! (And the gods bless every one.)

This was the news, as brought to you by YTAH. (I like my version better…)

(With apologies to Flight of the Conchords.)

Come on if you think you're hard enough.

“How much is that doggie in the window?”

It’s free.

It’s got rabies.

It bit me.

Now I’ve got rabies.

If you come into my shop I’ll bite you and give you rabies.

So come into my shop if you want to get rabies.

Come on if you think you’re hard enough.

Free rabies with every dog.

It’s a once in a lifetime offer.

 

Man, I’ve got a headache.

Say, could you hand me that tall glass of water?

I’m getting kinda thirsty in here.

And while I’m foaming at the mouth, would you

Hand me that razor on the desk?

No sense in wasting good foam.

And if you keep annoying me, I could slit my wrists.

My god you’re annoying.

If I could still move my arm I’d come over there and slap you.

Wait, does my arm look hairy to you?

It wasn’t this hairy this morning.

My palms weren’t so hairy this morning, either.

Hmmm. Maybe my parents were right.

Perhaps I’m turning into a werewolf.

If I were a werewolf, I’d come over there and slap you.

I can’t believe I got rabies working in a pet store.

I can’t believe I’m still working in a pet store.

It was supposed to be a summer job.

Say, is it getting hot in here?

God, I could really use a drink about now.

Could you pass me another glass of water?

There’s no more water?

Damn. Just my luck.

You want to give me a what?

You want to give me a shot?

Sorry, I don’t drink spirits.

Say, you wouldn’t have any rabies shots?

I dunno – vodka, Tabasco and a lime wedge, I guess.

Ha ha.

Wait, no, not frothy enough.

Let’s see.

Something with egg white.

Beer is pretty frothy…

Don’t you have any beer?

Nevermind, I brought my own froth.

Who knew rabies gives good head?

Er, wait, no, I don’t think I’ll drink that.

Is that Tabasco?

Only, it looks like diarrhoea.

I don’t think I’ll have that drink now.

What’s this? You think I’ve got en… syphilitis?

And my dog … my dog has it too?

You’re saying my dog has syphilis?

God, who gave my dog syphilis?

Someone fucked my dog, and now my dog has fucking syphilis.

You people make me sick!

Oh wait, what’s that?

You mean I’ve got … inflammation of the brain?

That’s a relief.

It explains the talking groundhog, at least.

Ha ha, just kidding. Nothing explains a groundhog that’s as big as a house.

It’s not just my brain that is swelling…

It’s all getting a bit hard to swallow.

But who’s gonna take care of my dog now?

Oh, he’s stopped spasming.

Twenty minutes ago he was humping my leg.

Then he got rabies and died.

My dog got rabies from humping my leg.

What the fuck is up with that?

Come into my shop and hump my leg if you want to get rabies.

Or you can come over here and bite me.

Yeah.

No doubt you’ve been lying awake nights, wishing, praying, and sobbing for an answer. Well, wonder no more. Due to the kind of snafu perpetuated daily by the postal service, we accidentally received a transcript of the last (unaired) show.

It starts with the host already annoyed. According to a note attached to the transcript, ratings were down, he’d just been served with divorce papers, he’d lost money on a large investment, his bank loan had been denied, and his sponsors were about to repossess his teeth.

Read it and weep, lovers of quality television. If only the cowards in TV Land had had the guts to show this life-changing episode.

LONG CREDIT SEQUENCE: over soft focus shots of the host looking pensive, the ANNOUNCER describes the life of a kid who talks to imaginary people, is picked on by others, and then grows up to annoy the whole planet.

Title Card: SPONSORED BY THE ZUCCHINI BROS., CHICAGO

FADE IN:

From left, THE GHOST WHISPERER walks onto center stage to the sound of SCATTERED APPLAUSE. Impatient, he stands in front of TONIGHT’S AUDIENCE and waits for the FOUR SYCOPHANTS HIRED BY THE STUDIO to stop applauding like idiots. After a beat, he waves them to silence.

THE GHOST WHISPERER:
(visibly annoyed)
Right. I’m getting a name. Gene – Geoff -
Geoffrey – George – Georgina – Genevieve -
Geppetto – Germaine?

(Sensing he’s losing the audience, he changes tack)
Gerry – Gerald – Geraldine – JAMES?
Jane – Janice – Jamal – Jason – Jasper – Jade?
Joan – Joni – Jameson – Jared – Jacob – Jaden -
Jarvis – Janet – Joshua – Joss – Josephine – Jo-Ann?
Joanna? Jocelyn? Jacosta? Jordan? Joy? Joyce?
Julia? Juliet? Julie? Juno? Justine? Jean-Paul? Jesus!
Jeremy? Jimbo? Ginseng? Joachim? Joel? Jules? Julius?

(desperate now)
Justus? Jethro! Jillian!? Jennifer!?! Jim? Joe?
Jehoshaphat? Joseph? JOHN?

No one has put their hands up yet.

THE GHOST WHISPERER:
(apoplectic)
Oh, give me a break! ONE of you inbred bastards
must know SOMEBODY named John!

(Beat.)

FEMALE AUDIENCE MEMBER:
Well, my husband is called John…

The Ghost Whisperer turns to her, gawping.

FEMALE AUDIENCE MEMBER:
… But he’s not dead, he’s sitting right here.

She points to a BURLEY REDNECK, sitting on her left.

JOHN:
(grumpily)
I didn’t even want to come here in the first place.
I hate this [CENSORED] show.

THE GHOST WHISPERER:
Fine.

The host takes out a gun and SHOOTS JOHN, then turns back to the female audience member.

THE GHOST WHISPERER:
John says hi.

John, dying in his chair, gasps for breath.

FEMALE AUDIENCE MEMBER:
But he’s not dead yet!

The Ghost Whisperer raises the gun again and shoots John TWO MORE TIMES.

THE GHOST WHISPERER:
John says thanks a lot, you stupid bitch.
Now shut the hell up.

FEMALE AUDIENCE MEMBER:
(sobbing with joy)
That’s my Johnny!

In the back row, an INBRED REDNECK kid wearing a checked shirt, baseball cap and overalls raises his hand shyly.

KID IN CHECKERED SHIRT:
Um. My cousin Jay died just last week…

The Ghost Whisperer looks at the Redneck contemptuously, then unloads the rest of the bullets in his head.

ANNOUNCER:
Join us next week for more…

The host turns the gun towards the camera, somewhere off to the left, empties the rest of his gun, and the screen goes blank.

Title card: “The End.”